Thursday, July 30, 2009

I'm THE Big Fat Panda


Its confession time. I’ve been feeling overwhelmed lately. 

Between work, writing and parenting, I’m pooped. So much so that yesterday when I got home and plopped my butt down on the couch, I declared myself in a deep funk. The kind that makes you feel all foggy and not at all motivated to finish the last of the line edits on that manuscript sitting on your desk cause, hey, how much of a chance do you have of making it anyway?

You know, that kind of funk.

What I needed was a good old-fashioned slap across the face. And today I got it, just how I like it--dressed up as a kids movie. 

Kung Fu Panda. 

I thought at first I would put it on and the boys would watch it while I did some work around the house. I should have known better.

I was sucked in. Being vaguely panda-shaped myself, I related to our hero immediately. A stress-eating misfit chasing his dreams, training even though he knows he’s probably not going to succeed. Hell, even his far more talented friends are having a hard time. 

Nope, doesn’t sound like anyone I know. 

Suddenly I wasn’t watching a movie on lazy afternoon anymore; I was in therapy. I became Po and my life was Tai Lung.  It didn’t even weird me out that I sounded like Jack Black. 

The kids were laughing and karate chopping the couch. But I was into it.

The more I watched, the more involved I became. Every joke and every fight scene. Until the end, when Tai Lung crawls out of his impact crater and tries one last punch at Po, saying, “You can’t defeat me. You’re just a big fat panda.”

And Po answers, “No. I’m THE big fat panda.”

And I came back myself with a big ol’ Hell Yeah.

Sometimes life is gonna try to kick my ass. I get that. The mix of working full time and writing will make me tired. Every now and again, I’m going to worry about how good of a of a wife and mother I am. On occasion the thought is going to creep into my head that I’m never going to make it in this business.

 And when that happens, I’m going to have to stand up, dust myself off and start kicking back. Cause I’m not just some wannabe. I’m THE big fat panda.


Anonymous said...

I *LOVE* that movie! We've watched it dozens of times.

Yeah yeah yeah...I'm know there are deep, meaningful lessons to be learned. But the fight scenes are KICK-ASS!

Don't be afraid to kick some ass! :-)


Martha Flynn said...

Can I be whoever Angelina Jolie voiced??

Sophie Littlefield said...

OK, this is what I'm carrying around in my head today! :) Thanks for the direction A :)

Juliet Blackwell said...

Boy, do I know *that* feeling. The one where you just don't feel like doing anything at all, least of all what you're supposed to be doing. That's where that whole "perseverance" part comes in...but now I have something new to tell myself: I'm THE big fat panda. Love it.

Anonymous said...

Martha Martha Martha....*I* get to be Tigress! YOU can be the praying mantis. BWAHAHAHAHA


Chandra said...

Adrienne--I love this! Just what I needed today (even though I'm stopping by a bit after the fact).
When I get home tonight, after I kiss the hubby and kid, after I put the dishes in the dishwasher and start a load of laundry, and before I sit down to write, I'm going to add that to the board that hangs over my computer: "I'm THE big fat panda!"

L.G.C. Smith said...

Adrienne, I love your posts, and this one...insightful and delightful. You are, indeed, THE big fat panda.